Today, I am 27 days symptom free from my eating disorder. This is a new record for me, and it falls just below the two symptom free months I enjoyed straight out of my third hospitalization. Since February, I allowed myself to be slightly drawn back into bulimia’s clutches. I’ve been slowly regaining my footing. Three days, nine days, fourteen days…and now twenty-seven. My success is in no small part due to the unwavering support of my boyfriend, Jay. He has been there for me through the worst, from the fifty minute bathroom breaks to the potassium drip. He has endured my relentless self-deprecation, the constant chatter of my eating disorder that surfaces whenever I pass a mirror. He has held me through the fullness and the frustration, he has stayed with me despite the selfish wall my eating disorder has built around me. He has loved me so fully, without hesitation, and because of this, I am learning to love my self.
If you’re reading this, I love you, bubbaloo.
Jay has taught me more than unconditional love; he’s also helped me grow stronger, and he’s allowed me to view food as something enjoyable. Several weeks ago, we went to Wildwood, where his parents own a beach house. We went to a restaurant called Beach Creek, and both ordered my favorite item on their menu — the house salad.
Comprised of “tender mixed greens, goat cheese & cracked walnuts with a strawberry vinaigrette,” it had both of our mouths watering for weeks to come, whenever the salad was mentioned. Today, we tried to recreate the salad for a picnic at the park, which we were unfortunately rained out of. However, it was cooler, and still very enjoyable to eat inside.
Though the salad from the restaurant definitely topped the one we made, our salad was very enjoyable, and I would definitely make it again. My pictures are rushed and don’t do the salad justice, as we were ravenous after a run at the park.
It really is a delicious summer salad, and it’s very easy to make. Jay and I both finished our bowls and sighed in contentment/fullness. It was a lovely, yummy day.