To those of you who celebrate, Happy Halloween! I’ve definitely been in the spirit for a few weeks now, what with decorations and Kara’s pre-Halloween photoshoot.
That’s right, on a roller coaster.
I did Madison’s makeup tonight to complete her “Angel of Darkness” costume. She wore fake eyelashes and everything, and I made her look like Natalie Portman as the Black Swan. That’s what was on the packaging, so that was what she wanted. She looked pretty cute, if I do say so myself.
I did indulge in the seemingly requisite holiday candy, with fun size Almond Joys and Reeses Pieces, and I honestly didn’t feel good about it. My mind kind of told me, “It’s fine, it’s Halloween! You’re supposed to eat more candy than normal!” And my mouth followed suit. As I stared into the candy bowl though, I felt overwhelmed, I felt like I wanted to try all the things I liked. I didn’t want any consequences. And although they are all mental, at this point, it’s still stressful to feel the internal push and pull towards what is good for me, and not my eating disorder.
After all my candy thoughts were over, Jay came over and we watched Texas Chainsaw Massacre. It was nice to be with him, and to be with the lights on! It was pretty gory at some points, but it wasn’t the scariest movie I’ve seen. I haven’t watched a horror film in ages. Probably because I’m super jumpy, especially with the scary music and surprising images, and whenever I jump or tense up really bad, Jay laughs.
The kids made out like bandits tonight, probably with a few pounds of candy. I should freeze some Peanut Butter Cups for whenever the craving strikes!